Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Name that holy book #7: Stumbling blocks are yummy!

This snippet comes from one of the most violent holy books.
I will consume man and beast; I will consume the fowls of the heaven, and the fishes of the sea, and the stumbling blocks with the wicked: and I will cut off man from off the land ...
The speaker of this scripture must be very hungry, indeed!


Mark Morrison said...

Zephaniah 1:3

a said...

"Consume" as in a fire consumes things, not like a person consumes things. You are willfully ignorant.

Robert Madewell said...

Yes it is Mark. Are you sure you didn't cheat?

A, so God's not a person? OK, I agree.

Hey A, This series is also about absurdity and humor I find in holy books. (I usually reseve this series for "non-christian" works.)

I realize that the modern usage of consume is probably not appropriate for this verse. But, isn't it dang funny? I think so. I have even thought of writing a webcomic portraying Jesus eating people, birds, fish, and cinder blocks. That's why I love the KJV.

Listen, I used to be so serious about the bible. Would you deny me the humor that I can glean from it, after wasting so much time on it? Maybe, you would.

Mark Morrison said...

I actually heard a local Pastor preach from this book. Very good sermon.

Robert Madewell said...

Here's another post I wrote on the Book of Zephaniah.

Omnipotence does not come with infravision.