Saturday, April 11, 2009

Ibex Gets Glurged

My good friend Ibex sent me this glurge that a religious friend of his sent him. I read it and discovered something very interesting about it.
We have enjoyed the redneck jokes for years. It's time to take a reflective look at the core beliefs of a culture that values home, family, country and God.. If I had to stand before a dozen terrorists who threaten my life, I'd choose a half dozen or so rednecks to back me up. Tire irons, squirrel guns and grit -- that's what rednecks are made of. I hope I am one of those. If you feel the same, pass this on to your redneck friends.Ya'll know who ya' are.

You might be a redneck if: It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase, 'One nation, under God.'

You might be a redneck if: You've never protested about seeing the 10 Commandments posted in public places.

You might be a redneck if: You still say ' Christmas' instead of 'Winter Festival.'

You might be a redneck if: You bow your head when someone prays.

You might be a redneck if: You stand and place your hand over your heart when they play the National Anthem....

You might be a redneck if: You treat our armed forces veterans with great respect, and always have.

You might be a redneck if: You've never burned an American flag, nor intend to.

You might be a redneck if: You know what you believe and you aren't afraid to say so, no matter who is listening.

You might be a redneck if: You respect your elders and raised your kids to do the same.

You might be a redneck if: You'd give your last dollar to a friend.

If you got this email from me, it is because I believe that you, like me, have just enough Red Neck in you to have the same beliefs as those talked about in this email.

God Bless the USA !

Keep the fire burning, redneck friend.

IF YOU DON'T STAND BEHIND OUR TROOPS FEEL FREE TO STAND IN FRONT OF THEM.

IN GOD WE TRUST
Here's my answers to the questions.
You might be a redneck if: It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase, 'One nation, under God.'
I'm not offended. However, I'd like to see it changed.
You might be a redneck if: You've never protested about seeing the 10 Commandments posted in public places.
I never have protested about that. I actually don't really care.
You might be a redneck if: You still say ' Christmas' instead of 'Winter Festival.'
I do call it Christmas.
You might be a redneck if: You bow your head when someone prays.
I do bow my head when someone prays. (I just don't close my eyes.)
You might be a redneck if: You stand and place your hand over your heart when they play the National Anthem....
I definitely do that. Religion and patriotism are totally separate things.
You might be a redneck if: You treat our armed forces veterans with great respect, and always have.
Always will. I was also in the millitary.
You might be a redneck if: You've never burned an American flag, nor intend to.
Never have and never intend to.
You might be a redneck if: You know what you believe and you aren't afraid to say so, no matter who is listening.
I also know what I don't believe in and I'm not afraid to say so.
You might be a redneck if: You respect your elders and raised your kids to do the same.
Yes I do respect my elders. I have no children, but would raise them to do the same.
You might be a redneck if: You'd give your last dollar to a friend.
Here you go! If you need it, it's yours.

I answered yes to every one of these questions. Hear that America! I love my country and I am an atheist!

Thanks goes to Ibex for the amusing piece of email.

Ing Od Wet Rust!

11 comments:

The Rambling Taoist said...

If these are the true characteristics of a redneck, I'm happy to report I am not one.

You might be a redneck if: It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase, 'One nation, under God.'

I don't think it "offends me", but it does irritate the hell out of me.

You might be a redneck if: You've never protested about seeing the 10 Commandments posted in public places.

I'm a big believer of separation of church and state. And yes I have protested re the 10 commandments.

You might be a redneck if: You still say ' Christmas' instead of 'Winter Festival.'

Hmm. I think I'll start saying Winter Festival or Happy Kwanza!

You might be a redneck if: You bow your head when someone prays.

I don't do that.

You might be a redneck if: You stand and place your hand over your heart when they play the National Anthem....

I certainly don't do that.

You might be a redneck if: You treat our armed forces veterans with great respect, and always have.

I try to be respectful of everyone -- uniforms don't earn extra respect.

You might be a redneck if: You've never burned an American flag, nor intend to.

I've never burned one and probably never will, but I don't have a problem with it either. It's a form of free expression.

You might be a redneck if: You know what you believe and you aren't afraid to say so, no matter who is listening.

This one is downright silly. I know several Muslims who say what they believe no matter what. Does that mean they are rednecks too?

You might be a redneck if: You respect your elders and raised your kids to do the same.

Another silly one. Most cultures teach this.

You might be a redneck if: You'd give your last dollar to a friend.

I don't think I'd give my LAST dollar to a friend. Maybe my next to the last one. :)

Robert Madewell said...

Some good point Taoist.

Redneck is actually a deroggative term. Kind of like hillbilly, cracker, hick, etc. To use the term to equate American is stupid and equating patriotic with religious or reverent is even more stupid.

My point was that I can answer every one of these questions and qualify as a "redneck" and I am an atheist.

Also, I'm not against anyone burning a flag as a form of expression, but that's not what it asked. It asks if I have ever done that or intend to. All in the wording.

As far as bowing my head, yeah I do. Because, I was raised to do that. But also, I let my family have their little rituals. I can at least show respect for my family if not for their silly traditions.

The National Anthem is a secular song. Unlike the pledge of alegiance, it doesn't mention God. I have no problem showing a bit of respect for The Star Spangled Banner.

Just because I am an atheist, doesn't mean that I must conform to their stereotypes of me.

The Rambling Taoist said...

Robert,

Understand that I did understand your main point and I agree with you 100%. I certainly don't disparage you for any of your answers.

I'm not around people who pray very often. When I happen upon such a situation, I tend to stare at the ceiling or out the window. Since the prayerful have their heads bowed, they shouldn't be paying any attention to the fact that my head is not bowed.

As to the national anthem, I sometimes sing along, though I much prefer the Canadian national anthem because it's a far better song!

fuuuuck said...

I've taken a queue from the future (Futurama) and prefer "Merry X-Mas". It irritates the heck out of my fundamentalist parents (since it "takes the 'Christ' out of 'Christmas'").

I also really like the Professor from the same show exclaiming "Sweet zombie Jesus!" They cut that out for TV, but it's on the DVDs.

PersonalFailure said...

Sorry, religious right, you don't own patriotism, respect for soldiers and our elders or good parenting.

Have a nice day.

GCT said...

"You might be a redneck if: You bow your head when someone prays."

What they really mean is when a Xian prays. I'm sure that most people equating "redneckitude" to "yay god" would not bow their head if someone were praying to Allah. That would be un-American afterall.

Robert Madewell said...

GCT,
I didn't think about that. I bet you're right.

Anonymous said...

Interesting,

I am anything but an American, but the list has a few points that would make me a red neck.

For instance, I have never thought of burning the American flag, it has never occurred to me, and I never would. Why? Because I may not believe in God, but I do believe in people. A flag is not just a piece of fabric, to me, it represents all the people that identify with it.

I may not be an American, I may not even like some American ideas, but I do respect each and every American. So, no. I would never burn the flag, and I am definitely not a red neck.

Anonymous said...
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Anonymous said...

As to the national anthem, I sometimes sing along, though I much prefer the Canadian national anthem because it's a far better song!.
.
Hey, Taoist, this adopted Canadian wholeheartedly agrees with you. I love "oh Canada," though many would like to change the line "God keep our land glorious and free." I suggest, "Let's keep our land glorious and free."

Leareth said...

"You might be a redneck if: You've never burned an American flag, nor intend to."


Actually, it's perfectly alright to burn American flags. The Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts, and various military organizations do so every year on Flag day.

Burning is deemed an acceptable and perhaps preferred method of disposing a flag, as stated in Title 4 Chapter 1 Section 8(k)of the United States code "The flag, when it is in such condition that it is no longer a fitting emblem for display, should be destroyed in a dignified way, preferably by burning." <= quote pulled directly off of Cornell Universities website.